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Apt613 sex survey results are in

By Greggory Clark on February 27, 2019

Once again, we invited readers to take The Big O-Town Sex Survey, shedding light on what happens behind Ottawa’s closed doors. For the pleasure of our readers, we’re now sharing the anonymous results.

711 people participated in this year’s edition of the Apt613 sex survey. The Big O-Town Sex Survey asked a couple dozen questions to get to know the ins and outs of Ottawans’ sex lives and the city’s dating scene. The questions cover a range of topics from orientation to masturbation to kinks and props, best practises and dating apps.

Four lucky respondents are receiving $100 gift cards to Venus Envy sex shop and bookstore. Winners of the random draw will be notified by email this week.

As always, please keep in mind that no actual statistics were harmed in the making of this survey… Apt613 is sharing the rock-hard data for fun.

Without further ado, here are the results:

Readers of all ages completed the survey.

While most respondents (67.0%) are between 19–39 years old, we received responses in every age group from adolescents to seniors. Maybe it’s time you talk to your parents about… blogs.

Most of you live in Centretown.

But a concerning number of respondents (31) live in “Centertown”.

None of Hintonburg, Westboro, Sandy Hill, Orleans, or Vanier were very far behind in popularity, which won’t surprise anyone.

The urban/suburban split is approximately 64/36.

Favourite responses: Way too far out, Suburbs, Boo, lebretton, centre town, O-Town where the O stands for orgasm, Sesame Street, Virtual, FU, Small, Rich.

To keep from skewing the local data, we had to disqualify 31 respondents from out of town. They wrote in from as far as Singapore, Nice, Vancouver, Toronto, Montreal, Prince Albert, Las Vegas, Palm Springs, Long Island… Did not see that coming.

We identify in all kinds of ways.

Open-ended questions about gender identity and sexual orientation received a ton of write-in responses.

While 57.5% identify as female and 39.8% identify as male, about 1 in 100 respondents answered with non-binary (1.0%). More responses include intersex, two-spirited, femme, demiboy, queer adjacent, and “still figuring it out.” Oh and make that one each for: Donkey Kong, Alien, Otter, and Helicopter (actual responses).

With regards to sexual orientation we found over two thirds of respondents describe themselves as straight. Here’s the breakdown:

  • Straight 71.5%
  • Bi or Bisexual 15.1%
  • Lesbian or gay 6.8%
  • Not sure right now 2.0%
  • Pansexual 1.5%
  • Queer 1.2%
  • Heteroflexible 0.8%
  • Asexual 0.4%
  • Straight-ish 0.2%
  • Demisexual 0.2%
  • Homoflexible 0.1%
  • Pretty straight 0.1%
  • Straight until further notice 0.1%

One is not the loneliest number…

65.4% indicated they are in a monogamous relationship, however… only 17 in 20 monogamists told us their *best sex ever* was with their monogamous partner.

For reference, 22.6% of all respondents said their best time was with a fuck buddy or friend with benefits, 10.2% said it was their ex and for 3.5% it was a steamy someone they met that night.

Only 2.9% indicated they are abstinent by choice.

…wait, is it?

How often do you masturbate? Are you among the 2.8% of respondents who masturbate more than once a day; 3.5% who never masturbate; or 13.1% who masturbate daily?

Perfect sex happens in your late twenties, early thirties.

Most of 17.5% of respondents who said they are having the “perfect amount of sex” are in their late twenties and early thirties. So were about half of 10.6% of respondents who, when asked, “How satisfying is your sex life?” answered, “The best ever.”

Relatively few are having what is called “enough” sex.

For every respondent who said they are having “almost enough sex” (31.2%) was another respondent having “nowhere near enough sex” (30.8%). Let’s get some folks introduced.

Of the remainder: 17.5% claim to be having “the perfect amount of sex,” and 6.8% say there’s “no such thing as too much sex!” A total of nine respondents indicated they are having “too much” sex.

Oh yeah, and another 10.7% answered “Hmmm. Having what?”

Is it hot or not?

Quantity is one thing, but how about quality? We asked: “How satisfying is your sex life?” You answered:

Trust me, I’m a professional.

Although 8.3% say they’ve engaged the services of a sex worker, only four respondents (0.6%) told us their best sex *ever* was with a professional.

Many people (32.8%) told us about BDSM fetishes and we figure that’s where some of this sex work might be kicking in. That Faces Magazine awards poll should really have had a “Best Dominatrix” category, don’t you think?

3.8% of respondents have offered services as a sex worker.

Gatineau Park is for lovers.

Most respondents say they’ve had sex in public in Ottawa (34.2%) or wish they have (18%). Only 3.2% of respondents said “I would never.”

Where is all of this public sex going down? By and far, the most popular places named were parks and parking lots. There were more than 100 write-in responses to the effect of Park, Parks, A park, In a park, Various parks, so on and so forth…

Favourite responses: Gatineau Park (6); uOttawa Campus (5); The roof of the Rideau Centre (4); Arboretum (4); Movie Theatre (4); Rideau Canal (3); Spa Nordik (3); Nepean Point (2); Majors Hill Park (2); Mooney’s Bay Beach (2); Dow’s Lake (2); Nightclubs; Westboro Beach; Britannia Beach; On the grass at Parliament Hill; The stairs behind Parliament; House of Commons; Parliament Hill near the river; Hotel elevator; A car on Preston St.; Suzy Q Donuts, table near window; Behind some bushes in the ByWard Market; In a car, while someone else was driving; Sauna at the downtown Y; In a bathroom at the Cock and Lion; Lieutenant’s Pump washroom; National Arts Centre; Front yard in Orleans; Chateau Laurier boardroom; Chateau Laurier bathroom; A dressing room at Urban Outfitters; On top of Smokes Poutinerie; The Manx. Sorry buds :(; Restroom at CHEO; Bathroom at the legion; Airport Timmies; Beavertail stand; At a wine convention in open but low traffic area; My mother’s Jeep; Hornets Nest Soccer Park; Bayshore staircase; Bus stop; Experimental Farm; City Hall; Shopify Terrasse; Carleton University stairwell; Arts Court; In a park on the swings; On a VIA rail train coming (lol) into Ottawa; Prince of Wales Bridge; Broken, half open elevator.

Who you doin’?

It seems Ottawans get around—or at least Apt613 readers do. Most survey respondents (65.9%) have had six or more sexual partners in their lifetime. Heck, 3.7% claim to have had 101+ partners. Here’s the complete breakdown:

Five people claim to have had 50+ partners in the last year alone. Here’s how responses break down to the next Q: “In the past year, the number of partners you’ve been with is…”

Some respondents could be racking up the partners with group sex. So we asked, “Have you ever had sex with more than one person at a time?” A little less than a third of respondents have had a threesome, foursome, or 5+ person orgy. Here’s that breakdown:

People are having one night stands.

Overwhelmingly so. About 7 in 10 respondents say they’ve had a one night stand.

Maybe dating apps have something to do with it.

7 in 10 survey respondents have created an online dating profile before. 1 in 4 are active accounts.

Popular apps include Tinder (21.8%), OkCupid (7.1%), Bumble (6.9%), Plenty of Fish (6.6%), Grindr (3.4%), Match (2.9%), eHarmony (1.8%), and Ashley Madison (1.3%). Lots more appeared as write-in responses, like Hinge, Zoosk, Scruff, Brenda, Happn, Feeld, Growler, Squirt, Christian Mingle, Gay411 and Bear411.

58.8% of respondents say they’ve been on a date thanks to an app (mostly Tinder, PoF, OkCupid).

Oh, the places you’ll go.

Going offline now: Apt613 wanted to know “Where do you go in Ottawa if you want to pick up?” and we expected to see a list of hot bars and clubs.

Since you’re wondering, these are the five sexiest venues in town (and the # of times they were named in survey responses):

  1. Babylon (8)
  2. The Lookout (4)
  3. Swizzles (3)
  4. Nature Nocturne (2)
  5. Joeys Lansdowne (2)

Favourite responses: ByWard Market (27); Elgin Street (21); Climbing Gym; Gary Bars[sic]; Harveys; A Concert; Queers & Beers; House Party; Nandos Chicken; Anywhere, I’m a woman.

Blind dates are still a thing.

About 1 in 4 respondents have been on a blind date. Although, nearly half of these people are 35+ years old and might not have had the luxury of creeping their date’s social media profiles ahead of time… With the advent of dating apps, we predict the number of respondents going on blind dates will trend downward in the future.

Ottawa is pretty kinky.

For starters, only 28.4% said they have “no” sexual fetishes or fantasies… that they know of. So let’s dive into some of the popular responses and remarkable write-ins.

The fetishes and fantasies named by > 1.0% of respondents are:

  1. Lingerie/underwear 38.3%
  2. Submission 35.8%
  3. Bondage 32.8%
  4. Domination 28.0%
  5. Role Play 22.9%
  6. Voyeurism 21.4%
  7. Exhibitionism 18.3%
  8. Costume play 11.9%
  9. Breath play 9.1%
  10. Sadomasochism 8.6%
  11. Corporal play 7.1%
  12. Leather gear 5.9%
  13. Gender play 5.2%
  14. Foot 3.0%
  15. Shoes 1.9%

More responses include: Age play; Vegans; Incest; Ass play; 8; Tantric; Choking; Group sex; Street cleaning; Scent; Apotemnophilia; Urophilia; Somnophilia; Daddy/Little; Cuckquean; Latex; Spontaneous sex; Pegging; Femdom.

Tips, tricks and tools.

7 in 10 are using vibrators in the bedroom. 1 in 2 are using handcuffs, tethers, or something similar. Another 1 in 2 are doin’ it with dildos and another 1 in 2 have used a blindfold.

Other props respondents are using in sexual play include: Sensation gels, cream, or similar (41.7%); Costume (27.5%); Crop, flogger, paddle or similar (22.6%); Hot wax or similar (16.5%); Medical equipment (2.6%), as well as a couple dozen write-in responses mentioning cock rings, nipple clamps, a tire jack, chocolate, anal beads, a drilldo, food, cannabis, q-tips, strap-ons, ice cubes, a snowsuit.

Shouldn’t you at least buy me dinner first?

Alright, some of you are cruising hard and that’s sick. But other readers are sitting here wondering how the hell everyone else is having orgies when they can’t even get a date. These next few Qs cover dating: blind dates, first dates, apps, and more.

We already know Ottawa-Gatineau is the most educated metropolitan area in Canada, considering 38.2% of adults here have a post-secondary degree. It also happens that Ottawa’s population is mostly female. So it’s thought educated women outnumber eligible men, making Ottawa’s dating pool relatively shallow if you’re a single hetero woman.

Perhaps it comes as no surprise that the results of Apt613’s survey show a tight split when respondents were asked, “is Ottawa a good city to be single?”

Most people (59.1%) who answered “Yes” are 30+ years old.

56.7% of respondents who said “Yes” identify as female (i.e. Ottawa is a good place to be single).

69.4% of respondents who said “No” identify as female (i.e. Ottawa is not a good place to be single).

Age isn’t a dealbreaker.

First we wanted to know, “How much older a person you would ask out?”

And followed that up with, “How much younger a person would you ask out?

First impressions are everything.

This doesn’t surprise anyone. However, those of you planning a first date will be thinking nervously about where you suggest to meet up and what you can do to impress your date. We have you covered.

As it turns out, most respondents want to go out for a casual drink (46.8%) or a coffeeshop (22.2%) over dinner at a restaurant (13.2%). Some people said going for a walk would be nice (7.5%). Very few respondents said seeing a movie is a good first date (1.2%).

What’s the best thing you can do to impress your date? With 67.6%, the overwhelming response is “Be curious about me.”

Favourite responses: Show up; Make me laugh; Be respectful and on time; Be kind to the restaurant staff; Recite prime numbers up to 10 digits; Cook dinner; Avoid misgendering me.

And the five best topics to discuss on a first date are:

  • Travel 23.9%
  • Your job or studies 23.3%
  • Current events 16.7%
  • TV/Movies 9.3%
  • Music 9.3%

Favourite responses: Apt613; Desired future; Meaning of life; Background and family; Nando’s chicken; What you’re reading.

The most common mistake made on a date is…

We wish there were only one. But the pie chart on this one has several large slices. The most significant responses were:

  • Talking about yourself too much 29.8%
  • Talking about exes 20.5%
  • Trying too hard 23.4%
  • Being too forward 8.3%
  • Being cheap 8.2%
  • Dressing poorly 4.9%

Favourite responses: Not asking questions (I’m looking at you MEN); I tried to click them all; Having no interests; Not bringing condoms; Showing up; Not being excited about oneself, life; Not discussing apt613; Ordering lobster; Not being straightforward; Making it feel like an interview; Being late; Not going to Nando’s.

If you wanna be my lover…

Finally, we asked survey participants to let us know what is the “biggest dealbreaker for getting into a relationship with you?” There are some pretty funny answers in here, so let’s just get the most common responses out of the way:

  • Intelligence or lack thereof 24.6%
  • No sense of humour 24.0%
  • No common interests 17.5%
  • Bad odour 13.1%
  • Bad sex 4.0%

Favourite responses: Lack of empathy or compassion; Narcissism; Bad politics; Being jealous or possessive; Hates dogs; No chemistry and all of the elements in your list; Being an ex murderer; Dirty underwear; Flatulence; Anal warts; How you treat service staff tells me exactly who you are; Smoking; Subtle men’s rights activist tendencies; Racist; Making less money than I do; Being conservative; A dislike of Nando’s chicken.

Thanks to everyone who dished the dirty. With just shy of 800 respondents, this has been one of the more popular editions since The Big O-Town Sex Survey launched in 2011.